As a child, Thanksgiving was always at my grandparents’ house. We dressed up a bit and crowded into their modest ranch home, where the traditional Southern turkey and dressing dinner took center stage.
We meticulously set the tables with the nicer dishes – adults at the main table and grandkids at the kids’ table. Napkin rings held cloth napkins that matched the tablecloth. Crystal glasses and bread plates framed each place setting. We even took turns ringing a glass bell to signal it was time to eat.
We weren’t a formal family, but Thanksgiving dinner required us to summon all our best table manners…and use all the breakable, hand-wash only dishes. In my youth, it felt like quite the production.
But we didn’t mind the extra work. All that fanciness made Thanksgiving feel more special.
Years pass and times change, but some things remain the same. The bell still rings at my house to start Thanksgiving dinner. We still take it up a notch from our usual jeans and yoga pants, set a pretty table and enjoy a delicious turkey and dressing dinner. But the dishes we use now can go in the dishwasher and we’re a bit less formal. Adulthood brings welcome perspective we often lack as kids.
There’s nothing wrong with being fancy and continuing cherished traditions as you wish, but Thanksgiving isn’t about the formalities or things going perfectly. It’s about connecting authentically and spending quality time with others. It’s about being grateful for all that we have, whatever that means for each of us.
What’s your Thanksgiving tradition? Do you share a meal with your family or organize a Friendsgiving instead? Maybe you volunteer to help serve at a food pantry. Or go shopping on Black Friday with your sister. Even if you aren’t formally sitting down to a table with anyone, connections look different for different people, and they all carry enormous benefits. The simple act of exchanging kind words or a genuine smile with a stranger on an afternoon walk can uplift your day and help you feel gratitude for the people and the world around you.
No matter how you spend this Thanksgiving and holiday season, let’s commit to letting down our guard and connecting more deeply with those around us, to being more authentic with each other. Let’s have a little grace and a whole lot of patience for those around our tables we don’t agree with (and maybe avoid talking politics!). Let’s listen more than we speak and stay curious about those around us. You never know what you’ll learn!
This Thanksgiving and throughout the year, I’m grateful for you. I’m grateful that you care deeply for your community and the people who live there. I’m grateful that you use your words and actions every day to be the change you want to see in our world. I’m grateful that, against sometimes huge odds, you stay committed to creating a better world you can’t yet fully see. That’s something we can all be thankful for.
Happy Thanksgiving!
