The legendary Pont des Arts pedestrian bridge in Paris has provided a path across the Seine River to the Louvre for over two centuries. But that longevity was no match for modern tradition.
In 2007, inspired by a popular Italian movie, lovers started hanging personalized padlocks on the Paris bridge and throwing the keys into the Seine below – a grand gesture of their undying love. Sounds romantic, right?
Eight years later, a section of the bridge collapsed under the weight of 700,000 locks. Not exactly a happy ending!
We love to celebrate love, especially on Valentine’s Day. But is destroying a historic bridge (even unintentionally over time) in the name of love the best way to do that?
Our mindset may need a slight adjustment.
Here’s where we stand.
A recent study shows that a whopping 86% of us believe in true love.
What does that look like this time of year? Not surprisingly, an estimated 6 million people get engaged on Valentine’s Day, the most popular day of the year to get down on one knee. Beyond proposals, in 2024, Valentine’s Day spending rose 5% over the prior year to $14.2 BILLION!
For those who often feel left out because they aren’t paired up, take heart. Nearly 30% of that money was not spent on a significant other. Friends, pets, teachers and coworkers also got in on the action. Real progress for a holiday that has for so many years put the focus on couples.
Up to 53% of young people ages 18-34 (and 42% of 25 to 34-year-olds) not “officially” celebrating Valentine’s Day will still do something special for themselves or plan an outing with friends or family around the holiday. NBC’s show Parks and Recreation even elevated February 13th to Galentine’s Day – a day where female friends celebrate each other by going out (or staying in!).
All great ways to celebrate our connections with others. But genuine caring and love – romantic or otherwise – shouldn’t be limited to Valentine’s Day. Or grand gestures.
Love starts with kindness. To our significant others and our kids. To our family members and friends. To our coworkers. To people in our community we don’t even know. Even those who get on our last nerve. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth it.
So pay someone a compliment. Hold the door open for the person coming in after you. Donate clothing or food for those in need. Support local businesses by shopping locally when you can.
Leave an encouraging message on a Post-it in a public place for someone else to find. Make eye contact and speak to the cashier instead of looking at your phone when checking out. Talk to someone you don’t know.
Pay it forward by picking up the tab of the next person in line at Starbucks. Tape quarters to a vending machine.
Call a friend you haven’t talked to in a while. Tell two friends what you love about them. Return a favor or send a thank you note to someone who has helped you out.
Offer to babysit or walk the neighbor’s dog. Take up someone else’s empty trash cans from the curb.
Everyone deserves to feel loved and connected. And with a little creativity and effort, everyone can.
You may be wondering: did the collapse of the Pont des Arts kill the grand padlock gesture? Not a chance.
They fixed the bridge in 2015 – removing the 700,000 locks and replacing metal grilles with smooth glass panels to discourage locks attachment – and outlawed the practice. But even today, people hang locks on fake metal trees (provided for this purpose) in Moscow, chains along the Great Wall of China, and random bridges and lampposts around the globe.
Seems you can’t stop love. And who would want to? Grand gestures are fun!
But it’s the simple, regular celebrations of love and connection and compassion that mean the most.
In big and small ways, make the effort to show people you care. Not just on February 14th. Every. Single. Day. The payoff will come back to you tenfold in ways you can’t even imagine.
That’s the real love of your life.
