Hundreds of people from every walk of life and background filled the large holding room. Sitting in the rows of government-issue chairs positioned so closely that your knees touched those of the person opposite you. Camped out against every wall on industrial-grade carpet. Standing in random open spaces trying to stay out of the way. They tried to make us comfortable, but the room was packed.
Although we got along and commiserated together, few of us really wanted to be there. We were missing work and school and life obligations that felt more pressing. But we were summoned, so we showed up and held our collective breath as they read batch after batch of names. We watched the chosen ones sigh with resignation as they headed upstairs as directed.
One of our most important civic obligations – jury duty – is often the least convenient.
At one point, a man entered the holding room looking more like the 60-something neighbor you see driving his riding lawn mower on the weekend than the judge that he was. He rallied our attention with his booming voice, saying that the parties in the case assigned to his courtroom had settled at the last minute so no jury was needed.
Interestingly, he said, the parties hadn’t been in the same physical space since the case was originally filed many months before. As the lawyers, witnesses, and court staff all busily did their jobs getting the case ready to go to trial, the people at the center of the dispute waited in their respective corners for their day in court.
But a funny thing happened when the warring parties actually got in the same room. They looked each other in the eye for the first time in a long time and started talking again. In the end, they worked out their differences and settled the case. No trial was needed. They got to determine their own fate.
Sometimes it takes the threat of a trial and the uncertainty of an outcome to make people settle the differences between them. But often, we could get to that point more quickly if we’d just lay down our swords and talk it out.
With the presidential election less than two weeks away and a range of other controversial issues like abortion rights on ballots across the country, let’s tread carefully in our interactions with those around us. Don’t assume others are bad people just because they associate with a certain group, have an unfamiliar background, or think differently. We can vote for different candidates or positions without disrespecting each other. We can agree to disagree with family members and friends and still share a fantastic meal around the Thanksgiving table. It is possible to work together and perhaps even reach consensus on the things that really matter.
Stay curious. Look each other in the eye. Keep talking. When we stop listening to outsiders telling us how divided we are, we just might be surprised to learn that we’re closer aligned than we think.
