In the wake of the assassination attempt on former President Trump’s life at a political rally in Butler, Pennsylvania this weekend, Trump, President Biden and countless others are rightfully urging the country to stand united against all senseless acts of violence.
But what exactly does this soundbite mean for us as individuals? What can we really do to help? Take heart. Your words and actions matter now more than ever.
The twenty-year-old (now deceased) shooter Thomas Matthew Crooks in this weekend’s assassination attempt was a registered Republican but had donated $15 to a progressive organization in 2021. His specific motive for shooting Trump is still unconfirmed. He was a member of a local gun club. The semi-automatic gun used at the rally was apparently purchased legally. There’s currently no official sign of mental health issues or active social media presence that would give clues to his behavior. And yet, in what’s become a familiar thread in many stories of gun violence, former high school classmates describe Crooks as a quiet “loner” who was bullied for wearing hunting clothes to school often. The investigation continues, but it begs the question – would he have opened fire at a political rally if he’d felt more seen or validated as a person in the world?
Sadly, rally attendee Corey Comperatore was killed as he protected his family from the gunfire. He was a Trump supporter and former fire chief who’s being described as a hero who loved his family and his community, helping people whenever he could. Whether or not you agree with his politics, he left an especially meaningful reminder for all of us in his choice of friends. Comperatore and Biden supporter Paul Hayden were neighbors and good friends for at least two decades despite their very different political beliefs. Comperatore and Hayden’s mutual respect and friendship shows that you don’t have to agree with someone on every issue (or even most issues) to want to include them in your life.
As a country, there’s no question we are divided over politics. Political parties often seem more inclined to capitalize on uniting people against an issue or opposing group than rallying their followers for something. We feel pressured to take a side in every conversation on every topic, but the best answers are often found instead in the gray area between opposing views.
Stories of divisiveness play on repeat from our news sources. It often feels like an impossible gap to close. Encouragingly, though, a 2024 Associated Press-NORC poll confirms that we still agree on the fundamental beliefs that make us American: https://apnews.com/article/ap-poll-democracy-rights-freedoms-election-b1047da72551e13554a3959487e5181a. Our diverse backgrounds and experiences just cause us to differ as to how to put those values into practice.
The details do matter, but when you interact with others, try to keep in mind that most of us want the same things – to live peacefully with those we love in a place that supports our highest democratic ideals. We can coexist and even thrive alongside each other while still disagreeing. Our differences can be frustrating, but they make us stronger by allowing us to flesh out and test ideas that will benefit us all in the end.
The next few months ahead of the presidential election will continue to test our resolve and ability to get along with people who think differently than we do. But even when we disagree, we need to learn how to talk to each other with respect again.
To bridge the divide, we challenge you to reach out respectfully to one other person every week whose views differ from your own on a given topic. Just dip your toe in the water. Ask them their thoughts on a recent news story or something happening in your lives. Then present your own views in a way that is not confrontational or attacking (eg. – “That’s an interesting perspective considering what you’ve been through. In my experience, I’ve found that…”). Maybe start with a less controversial topic and build from there.
Your goal is to establish trust and mutual respect by giving both of you a safe place to express yourselves. You’ll likely find you have more in common than you think. At the very least, you’ll have a better understanding of another point of view and maybe even adopt a fresh perspective. Who knows, you might just find yourself enjoying a great friendship with someone with a vastly different outlook…and your conversations will never be boring!
Let’s stop waiting for others to narrow this divide for us. Instead of raising our fists as a sign of strength against a perceived enemy, let’s try clasping each other’s hands in solidarity and support of what we commonly believe in and welcome talking about how we feel differently. One respectful conversation at a time, we can bridge the gap that currently separates us.
